Electric Beans
My best friend died and became immortal in the same afternoon.
It was Water Day — the day in elementary school when instead of learning you go outside and wear swimsuits and play in hoses and do the whole slip’n slide thing. Anyway, I was fat, but my best friend Beans, he was even fatter. I’m not sure how much he weighed, but he was nine and if you put him next to a third-trimester-already-overweight-expecting mother, she looked reasonably fit. As one might imagine, we hated taking off our shirts in public. We hated it a lot.
A week before Water Day Beans approached me with an idea. Ever since last year’s Water Day when Beans got his nickname for having breasts shaped like beans, he had been hatching a plan to avoid disrobing in front of our class. Knowing we were more or less in the same boat, he assumed I’d be interested. And of course I was. I didn’t need a food-based nickname; what I needed was Beans’ plan.
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Published by Jimmy Marble
